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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29643357">First Year Bonding Session</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/astromirage/pseuds/astromirage'>astromirage</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Constipation, Hinata Shouyou &amp; Tsukishima Kei Friendship, Kageyama Tobio &amp; Tsukishima Kei Friendship, Kageyama Tobio is Bad at Feelings, Kageyama Tobio is a Little Shit, M/M, Numbness, Secrets, Truth or Dare, Tsukishima Kei &amp; Yachi Hitoka Friendship, Tsukishima Kei Protection Squad, Tsukishima Kei is Bad at Feelings, Tsukishima Kei is a Good Significant Other, Tsukishima Kei is a Mess</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 20:34:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,044</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29643357</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/astromirage/pseuds/astromirage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Kei forgets about the first-year bonding session that everyone else was so excited for. Secrets are unearthed, feelings are felt and Kei is vulnerable.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>All The First Years &amp; Kei Tsukishima, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>95</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>First Year Bonding Session</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>THIS IS MY 60TH HAIKYUU FANFIC!!!!!!!!!!!! so I wanted to grapple Kei's issues with needing to not get close to anyone in fear of hurting them the way he caused Akiteru to hurt.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>drip drip drip</em>
</p><p>Kei huffs at the constant leak of the sink faucet and leaves the bathroom, slamming the door on the way out. His hands are shaking, his brain is numb but all too loud, he makes his way to the gym and the chaos within in him amplifies as he walks there, every footstep is followed by the noise turning up in volume. It suddenly stops as he opens the lockerroom door to see the first years sitting in a circle on the floor, or as good as a circle as 4 people can form. </p><p>“Uh?” Kei asks, nearly inaudibly, looking at Tadashi for help. </p><p>“First year bonding time! As prescribed by Sugawara!” Yachi squeaks out, scooting over to let Kei sit next to Tadashi. </p><p>“Oh.” Kei sits, the noise returns, ever since he was harshly scolded by his boyfriend at training camp, everything he knew was falling apart around him, his walls and assurance in the way he acted was breaking away. </p><p>Kei was suddenly aware of everything he said, the way he acted towards his team members, and ultimately, the way he saw volleyball. His world wasn’t the same and he didn’t know how to stop it. </p><p>“Tsukki?” Tadashi asks, tapping his shoulder, the noise weakens as he looks up at the smiling face of his boyfriend, “We’re playing truth or dare, it’s your turn.” </p><p>“Oh, uh, Tadashi, truth or dare.” </p><p>“Truth!” he sticks his tongue out at Kei. </p><p>A smile twitches at his lips and he clears his throat. “Is it true that you suck at cooking ramen?”</p><p>“Tsukkkkiiiiii!” he complains and flops down, mimicking that Kei had stabbed him. </p><p>He sighs dramatically and nods. “It’s true, I either burn it or I overcook the noodles.” </p><p>Hinata bursts laughing and points at Tadashi, “I’m so sorry Yamaguchi but that’s so funny!” </p><p>He narrows his eyebrows and blows a raspberry at Kei. “Boo, you suck.” </p><p>He feels the noise strengthen as Yamaguchi begins asking Yachi “Truth or Dare”</p><p>It goes around a few more times, Kei, thankfully and conveniently being skipped, until Kageyama spouts out an all too confident, “Tsukishima, truth or dare.” </p><p>He huffs and replies “Truth.”<br/>

“Why don’t you give a shit about volleyball or this team?” </p><p>The room goes silent and Tadashi’s fists his hands. “Why would you ask him that?! What is your problem?!”</p><p>Kageyama doesn’t pay mind to the pinch server’s anger and shrugs, “I want to know, I’m sure the entire team wants to know.” </p><p>“Bakageyama! That was a stupid question!” Hinata scolds, shaking his head. </p><p>“Oh shut up dumbass!” he yells back. </p><p>“I agree with Hinata, it was kind of unkind to ask that,” Yachi adds, scared as to what the reaction to her saying that would be. </p><p>“It wasn’t just unkind, it was mean and uncalled for and fucked up!” Tadashi shouts and leans forward, getting closer to Kageyama.</p><p>“I get it.” Kei disrupts the shouting match and yanks Tadashi back gently. “I apologize for my less than enthusiastic attitude, I have a <em>complicated</em>, past with volleyball.”</p><p>Kageyama suddenly feels a twinge of guilt within him and he looks down. “Sorry.” </p><p>“It’s whatever,” Kei says noncommittally. </p><p>That question obviously, didn’t help the deafening ringing in his brain. The rest of the time is awkward and Kei feels something welling within his chest. </p><p>“Tsukki,” Tadashi says, “Truth or dare.” </p><p>He boldly says “Dare,” knowing he’d be safe with Tadashi asking that simple question. </p><p>“I dare you to kiss me.”</p><p>“Oh, the horror.” He rolls his eyes and brings his boyfriend in for a deep, sloppy, passionate kiss, Kei feels his brain calm down while their lips collide quickly.</p><p>Yachi squeaks as they part and Tadashi, with a blissed smile, sits back in his spot. His chest still feels tight with everything running through his static brain.</p><p>Suga opens the door and smiles, “You guys can leave now if you’d like.”</p><p>“Thank you!!” Hinata says, getting up and stretching his limbs. “You guys wanna go get meat buns!?! I’m hungry.”</p><p>“Oooh, that sounds yummy!” Hitoka smiles, standing up and brushing any dust from her skirt. </p><p>Tadashi looks to Kei and Kei nods. “Me and Tsukki will tag along.”</p><p>Kageyama shrugs as a confirmation and the five leave the gym. Hinata excitedly talks about some volleyball thing, not that Kei was exactly listening to him. Tadashi has his arm around Kei and keeps it that way until they enter the store. They all get meat buns and their respective drinks. Hinata actually buys two for himself and he shoves them in his mouth furiously. Kei holds the hot bun in his hands but doesn’t eat it. The tightness in his chest wells and he takes a deep breath, squeezes his eyes closed, and looks down to the ground. That tightness pops in his chest and he stops in his tracks. </p><p>“I’m sorry,” he says, cutting through the peaceful silence. </p><p>“Kei?” Tadashi asks, looking at the boy who is staring at the ground. </p><p>Shoyo, Tobio, and Hitoka turn to see the boy gripping his meat bun as his hands shake. </p><p>“I’m sorry for being mean, I’m sorry for not trying, I’m sorry,” He mumbles, legs shaking, he squishes the bun and lets a few tears roll down his cheeks. “I’m just so scared of you guys leaving me, that I decided to make you hate me instead. I have a hard time showing how I feel but I was just terrified. I’m sorry for being a bad person.”</p><p>“Woah, Tsukishima, we don’t hate you,” Tobio explains, approaching him. </p><p>“Yea! We know you’re just joking around with us, we never take anything too seriously.” Shoyo says. </p><p>“We’re not going to leave you, we promise!” Hitoka shouts, smiling and looking at Tadashi. </p><p>“You’re not a bad person Kei, you're hurt and confused,” Yamaguchi says, caressing his face and kissing his cheek. </p><p>“Thank you guys, so much.” He replies, wiping away his tears and sadly eating the smushed meat bun from his hand. </p><p>The first years’ hug onto the tall blonde and squeeze tight.</p><p>“We’re always right here Tsukishima,” Yachi assures. </p><p>“I’m sorry for asking what I did. I didn’t mean to-”</p><p>“It’s fine.” Kei stops him.<br/>

The noise stops and the numbness leaves his body. He has friends.</p>
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